I am Fake James Kendrick ya’ll
I knew it would happen eventually and quite frankly I always figured it would happen sooner than it did. I have been outed by Ralph W. Waldo, an editor for Popular Quantum Mechanics Magazine (PQMM). For the past 3 years I have gotten away with the ultimate punk- yes, I am Fake James Kendrick. Known to myself as FJK, I have pulled the wool over the eyes of everyone in the mobile tech world. For years you thought you’d been reading the wisdom of the greatest mobile tech mind ever, James Kendrick. Who could blame you? The pearls of mobile tech wisdom were so often on the cutting edge, no, the very foreskin of mobile tech brilliance. Little could you know you were actually following a total fraud, FJK. My punk was so well done and deep seated that no one even realized it was going on, and it took a major operation conducted by PQMM to unmask FJK. Even existing as just a cartoon head Kevin didn’t even know I was fake. So a lot of you are no doubt asking yourself what will happen now? Never fear, after the book and movie deals are signed FJK will return better than ever. Most of you probably won’t even be able to tell that anything is different, I’ll just keep writing brilliant things about mobile tech and you’ll keep reading them. Of course I’ll be staggeringly wealthy due to the book and movie deals. Sure Fake Steve Jobs has been outed, but he’s just a rank amateur compared to me. You didn’t even know I was fake, how cool is that, techtards?
I’m Shocked! SHOCKED! I tell you! We all have been duped. I feel shame for not seeing through the now obviousness of the FJK. I now question other Blogs I read. Is Kevin the real Kevin or the Fake Kevin?
Should I question Scooble? Well who would really want to fake him? Really? I think we’re safe there.
Oh my god I am so disillusioned now!
How do I know if this isn’t FWWW, the fake internet. Or if I’m really on a FiM, rather than on a real iMac??? Aaaargh!!
Fake. The real fake James Kendrick would never truly reveal his fake true identity. It’s true.
I’ll have two of whatever the writer of the post above was drinking while writing it
And that’s the writer of the POST not comment.
Triple venti sugar-free vanilla dry cappuccino.
Non-fat.
The real question is: What happened to the REAL James Kendrick!
Will the real James Kendrick please stand up?